In this wasteland, where I’m living,
there is a crack in the door filled with light.
And it’s all that I need to get by…
I thought about the lyrics above as we sat around a table last night. We were discussing what authentic relationships looked like to us, how did we define real, and what could we embody in Christ’s character in enabling our own authenticity.
One of the women at the table said that in order to be authentic, you had to know who you were first. Truly know who you are. Another commented on the beat that in order to know you are, you often have to be broken first. You have to be split apart, often not understanding the why, but that God shines through the cracks, flooding what was once in shambles.
To talk about the most significant relationship I have had in my 33 years is something I do often here on the blog. There were alot of things wrapped up in that relationship. Will I ever stop talking about that? Sure, but I also am grateful that in that relationship I got broken. It was a broken that I don’t believe I would have ever gotten to on my own, causing a dependence upon God alone over this last year.
He flooded the cracks, melding broken parts back, and filling in some holes that I had not realized were very apparent in me. Not that I believe we all have to be utterly broken in order to be wife material. However I am firm in my belief that we have to get beyond our selves in order to see what needs filling. That filling can only come through cracks we’ve tried to mend, or sought others to fill, in our lives. Ultimately our brokenness leads us to depend upon ourselves or God for healing.
When you learn that your broken parts are just the right shape and size for Him to use, a powerful thing occurs. You stop using Scotch tape to put it all back together and let Him solder you with a burning desire for Him instead.