I have a sassy mouth. I know that I have had it nearly as long as I was independent. It’s sarcastic and often cutting in my words. For many years I gave no caution to what I said, only that I made sure it was said. I can still hear my mom when I was around ten or eleven saying “Sara, your mouth is going to get you in trouble if you don’t stop talking.”
And mom was right.
As one would expect, it cost me some relationships, tense working conditions and some hard conversations. It also led to me looking at how I wield words. I have talked about this before here on the blog several times.
I was reminded of this last night as I listened to one of our study’s co-leaders discuss the power of our words in a marriage relationship. As a woman, we like our words. We like to talk things out, discuss and ruminate. We enjoy catch-ups and gab sessions. We love our gossip right?
Well if we dig into Proverbs we see that our words are pretty powerful, whether joking or true. In 18:21 of Proverbs we see that death and life are found in the tongue.
Death and life are in the power of the tongue,
and those who love it will eat its fruits.
So we have the power to destroy. Or we have the power to give life. All in what we say with our mouths. We who love the good of it will reap the good of what it bears. Those who love the bad of it will reap the bad, rotten of what it produces.
Do you relish in being able to craft a harsh diatribe? Do you revel when you can talk about others? Do you cut down your husband or boyfriend to your girlfriends? That has an impact far beyond anything you can see or do to regain it.
In looking at how this affects wife material, I have to really push you to look at how you criticize others. It’s a hard one I am learning in the midst right now. Not that you have to put on a facade or lie, but that you find means of encouragement and lifting up. The world is a critical place already, why would we want to add anything additional to it?
When you want to gossip, pause and consider how the foundation you set now will be what you build upon in relationships. In marriage. If you’re married, I beg of you to find ways to talk about your husband in the positive when you’re at work, with your girlfriends and with your family. For us single women it gives us a means of inspiration and hope. A light to guide us in the right direction of being wife material.
If we are loving others just as Christ loved them, how are we reflecting that in what we are saying? Do we choose life or death with our tongues?