For years I was the girl who was friends with a bunch of guys. I thrived on staying out of friendships with women. I found them catty, vindictive and deceitful. Truth be told, I had been crushed by a friendship with two other girls in high school. As high school girls are prone to do, we upped the drama and lessened the reality. Throughout college I flocked to my guy friends, who are some of the best guys in the world to be friends with honestly. I had one or two females I counted as deep friendships but always at arm’s length.
Last evening, as I sat around a table eating Mexican food with three strong, single, faith-filled women I realized how my world had changed in 14 years. I had opened up room in walled-up heart to female friendships. I suddenly realized the why of these relationships. It wasn’t something selfish that I could get from them, but that God had purposed us to have connections that are deeper than friendships with men. We can commiserate on the various trials of being a woman in this era…and what being single looks like now.
I laughed harder last night than I have in ages, and grew rather fond of holding onto that memory on the drive home as I crave more moments such as those. Women need each other. We uplift, pray and feel with one another. I feel so often we would rather cut down, berate, and destroy one another in order to make ourselves look better to the world…I am guilty of it as well. We were given to support, to encourage…what would our lives look like with circles of women friendships that reflected that? Instead of viewing the women in your life as hassles, headaches, competition I challenge us all to look at them as support, as our cheerleaders and prayer warriors.
We as women can be our own worst enemy or the vessel God wants to use in another woman’s life, if we’ll let Him do His work. We desire more from our relationships than we give women credit for. We are sisters in the faith, and sisters of the heart that often goes overlooked in pursuit of selfish gains. I pray today that if there are women out there who are hurting from a marred female friendship that healing would commence and truth be spoken into each woman today to encourage and support each other.