I have a color-coded calendar. If I am being honest, I have two. One on my fridge at home, and one through Outlook. I even have how many miles I complete in my workouts. It’s borderline efficiency with a dab of cray-cray.
Up until two years ago, I lived on paper. My days were mapped out via a paper planner bound and color coded with different pens. As the planner grew proportionally larger and I saw myself toting that thing around with pride, I grew concerned. With the conversion to a digital calendar over the last two years I have found it easy to ignore the grand picture and instead focus on the week-to-week duties.
However after careful contemplation and a review of my calendar (as well as several people commenting on the busyness of my life) I took a step back. I asked myself these questions: Does my calendar reflect my values? Could someone see my priorities reflected if they glanced at this? With those questions I found myself filled with courage and hope. To say NO. To quit some things that are just good on paper, but taking alot of time away from the priorities I have right now.
I hate letting people down, and I hate cancelling on commitments. However I need to be resilient in protecting the very little time that is available each day. I realized I was forsaking friendships, relationships (something I highly value) for one more meeting or calendar appointment. I had lost my energy and inspiration to write. I was just subsisting in my life, and that is most definitely not in alignment with my priorities. Sadly I trimmed the fat on my calendar. Instead of squeezing in another meeting in my already jammed up life, I resigned. Yes, I resigned my volunteer position on a board. While it was something I was excited about, it ultimately didn’t match up with what I am valuing in my life.
Sometimes you have to quit something to start living fully. Today is Thursday…quit convincing yourself a packed calendar means you are worthy. Quit listening to the fear that if you say no you’ll be letting someone down. The only person you’ll be letting down is yourself.
. . . and you live with yourself every day.