I promised myself I wouldn’t do it…that I’d leave my walls up when it came to guys. I would be cold-hearted and just not deal with men, to be a spinster for the remainder of my life.
Then I let my walls down and threw caution to the wind. I decided to give a guy my phone number…and that’s when my gut flipped its lid and I regretted that decision for the next two weeks. I would get texts that exceeded the limit for iPhone times three each time. He wouldn’t call, he would text. While at first I thought it was endearing, it quickly became annoying. Then came the text to end all further communication with this guy. He texted me at midnight to let me know he was car shopping and that he was debating upon the idea of bathing his cat at that point of the night. I wish I was making this up but I am not.
That’s when it hit me. I hate dating in the technology age. I absolutely hate it. I’m an old soul who just hates this part of being in the modern age.
When did we move into Facebook messenger, Tweets, and texts as the way to court a woman? When did we get away from asking someone out in person? When you got the nervous sweaty palms even from dialing the phone praying the dad wouldn’t answer?
What happened to courtship? Even more so, what happened to women holding the standard high for being pursued? Maybe this is why I am still single, because I have a high standard…but there was a time when men rose to the standards set rather than asking women to deal with it or end up alone.
This is my call out to every single woman, lady, and young girl, hold fast to your standards that are reasonable (Justin Bieber isn’t reasonable) and don’t drop them because of a guy that can be fleeting. If he asks you to change (again beyond reason) then he’s not the one for you. Just as you are made in the image of God as a complement to a man, he is there to support and be your head as also an image of God. Hold high your integrity and your worth as the reflection of God and as a woman, as those are bound together in who you are. Women we should be discipling other women in these virtues instead of stooping to cattiness and back-biting. Why don’t we encourage one another in our standards instead of competing with them?
Now single men and guys…we women need men of value and purpose in our lives. We need you to step up to be the man God created you to be as well. That means having authority and walking in righteousness. That means mentoring those behind you to raise them up in the image of God as well. This generation is in desperate need of men who are of godly and honest rapport. Men who take the time to be intentional in their relationships with women and set those as examples for those coming behind them. I hear often how you complain that women take the control so often or that we’re too independent. Sadly it is because we have not had any men rise up to lead. We desire that more than anything-men who lead justly and righteously as men of God.
I firmly believe its time both single men and women set standards and beliefs for their lives and hold fast to those as they seek after God intensely. When you set them before being in any relationship, you’ll quickly realize that talking about your cat via text at midnight is not okay…that we should be getting to know one another face to face and seeing how life is revealed in the moments in the in-between.