The Head and the Heart…

I have been asked out twice in the last week, and said no to both of them. I am talking about legitimate dates here people, with guys…and I turned them both down. While I am on medication, it’s for a cold and not of the mental kind. So all signs point to me being sane and saying NO to two guys who are both perfectly fine and seemingly normal.

For the last two plus months I have thought on life being single, given the breakup between myself and the lawyer man. I have prayed about it, sought advice, and ultimately dug into God’s word on singleness. I got really frayed on this subject because I didn’t feel like I was much of a resource on single life. Then I realized I’d had about 16 years experience (off and on, mind you) of being single. Sixteen years in anything lends itself to being quite the master, so let me share something with you all.

While there may come a day in the coming weeks where I wish I had said yes to one, or both, potential suitors, deep down I know neither would have been good for me. Neither would complement me, nor would they encourage me in my life where I currently sit. They would be distractions. They would be a free meal, a fun companion to the movies or concerts, but I know beyond any doubt they are not the absolute best God has in store for me. Rather than waste time, money, and attention on guys who deserve a woman’s complete self engaged in life with them, I chose to say no and I am happy about it. It sounds weird to say that. However I have firm belief that God has the very best for me as His child. If that means I remain single I am at peace with His decision.

I am not saying this is a forever decision, as I am completely open to God’s will in my life on this. However I believe as single Christian females we are often encouraged to date (rightfully so or not) to fill this vacancy in the man department, without much consideration to the state of heart and our head. I don’t want to settle for less than the best, and God’s best trumps my best every time.

No I don’t have anyone in particular in mind, and again, I am okay with that. I know God’s got a much bigger, and vastly better plan for me than I can fathom…and that truly excites me. This life that has been gifted to me isn’t meant to be spent in-between relationships, pining for someone, settling for a here and now rather than seeking God’s plan for me. My completeness is in Him and I can trust in that alone.

Let perseverance finish it’s work so that you may be mature and complete , not lacking anything. -James 1:4

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