I had the honor and privilege of being a part of the faith family at CrossPoint Community Church-Nashville campus on Sunday morning. I strongly encourage you that if you live anywhere in the vicinity of Nashville you should visit…and if you’re ever in Nashville, definitely go to one of their campuses for a service. I was slightly nervous about going to be honest, but the good nervous like a first date kind of happy jitteriness. It’s been a while since I’ve been a “visitor” at church. I’ve been a member at Sevier Heights for almost a year and a half, and began attending almost two years ago (this January 1 to be exact). I pray that every person who walks through the doors at SHBC feels as welcomed as I felt at CrossPoint.
After finally meeting Morgan face-to-face for the first time, I went into the sanctuary where I was introduced to two other women who attend. As the service started, it really felt different to sing there…don’t ask me why or how…as I’m still trying to figure it out. I closed my eyes and just worshiped in those moments. I was surrounded by my brothers and sisters in Christ, praising Him and thanking Him. We sang “Arms Open Wide” which I’ve posted below…this was the moment…the moment for me and God. It’s what the last seven months have been leading to, what my entire life has been leading to…I’ve talked about how I’m called to the mission field and I’m praying about what that looks like and really digging that out with others and in my prayer and meditation time with God. But I have to say, that moment standing in that pew worshiping is seared into my mind’s eye. In that moment, I told God what I had been struggling to admit for months…I had written it, and yeah, I’d said it. But in that moment…for the first time I meant it with all of me.
On the drive back Sunday afternoon to Knoxville, I was attempting to process what God was showing me. Can I tell you how blind-sided I was? For months I have pondered, sought out, and talked about living my life in a context outside of the United States, in a way that would bring glory to God, going to His people so that they may know Him like I do. I think in a way I took God’s revelation of missions work and made it my own. I know I need His discernment in this. But what blind-sided me and really caused me to really be distracted was this thought…”I want you working with the homeless in Nashville through the ministries at CrossPoint.” This is what is rocking me right now…it’s pretty all-consuming and I just am back on my knees praying for Him to have His way. If this is His directive, I have to be obedient…I want Him to have His way. I’m not sure where this is leading, but I ask that you pray for me as I’m thrown off by this in a way I wasn’t prepared for. May I have all knowledge and discernment to follow in whatever God’s will is for me in the mission field.